Wednesday, June 15, 2011

stay out of my spot!

i am going to start carrying around big handicap stickers to put on all the parked cars that piss me off. i'm going to smack them on right on the front windshield, directly in the center of the driver's side, strategically placed so that it causes just enough danger driving that they have to spend the next 45 minutes trying to peel off a stubborn sticker before being able to drive away. the sticker will also say "be considerate!" would that be illegal...?

i've lately been finding myself in multiple situations every week where people are inconsiderate of handicap parking spaces... or i just get irrationally angry because there's not an open spot for me. the issue isn't where i park. i really don't care how close or far away i'm parking from my destination (unless it's freezing, but that's when i hate literally everything so that doesn't count.) the issue is these handicap spots are built for people who need the space. i need, legitimately need space next to my car in order to get in and out, by myself and safely. life would be better if only i could grow a pair and verbally tear apart the old farts sitting in their idling cars while i'm forced to park somewhere that doesn't guarantee i'll be able to get back in my car. i'd like to live without the guilt of when my childish anger takes over and i "accidentally" scratch up the car idiotically parked diagonally into my spot and in front of my door. and it would be wonderful if those without plates or placards could stop taking my spot, then blatantly refusing eye contact or any kind of verbal or non-verbal apology, while apologizing to everyone around me.

but on the brighter side of things, at least there is still some kindness and consideration in this world. after someone took my spot, i was forced to park in a "normal" spot. a nice old soul offered to help me by putting a cone next to my door so that when the time comes, i will have the space i need to get into my car. of course when i came out, there was a car parked on my drivers side, making it impossible for me to get in my car.... and the cone was next to the passenger side's door. apparently, someone thought we were in england. i couldn't even be frustrated, that's hilarious.

moral of the story. stay out of my goddamn handicap parking. that includes you, old folks.

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